The microscopically detailed news analysis of the caucuses have already driven me crazy.
“So here we are looking at Smithfield County, Anderson, and Sanders and Clinton are neck-and-neck here. Now, if we look at the precincts in light blue—back in 2008, voters in those precincts preferred pickles on their cheeseburgers. Historically, we’ve seen that people who prefer pickles on their burgers tend to be more liberal, with those who prefer ketchup leaning in a more conservative direction. What this means in this race, Anderson, is that Clinton should be worried about her position in Smithfield County…”
The preceding satire has been brought to you by absurdity and brain ache.